This is a wire brush.  Wire brushes are inexpensive and very useful for cleaning grease and dirt from old car parts.  All you need is the brush, some rags, and a lawyer to stand in 40 degree weather and scrub for hours.

Welcome to my glamorous world of classic car restoration.

Public defense work was a grind; the hours were long, the cases were countless, and the constant multitasking required to do the job properly was mentally exhausting. But none of those tribulations prepared me for the physically difficult work that is working at a shop.  Much of my work right now consists of lifting, scrubbing, and degreasing things around the shop.  You’d be amazed at how much vinegar 7 hours of scrubbing will take out of ya.

And for barely any money too.  At the PDs office I was making $63k a year, which isn’t much for an attorney from a good law school, but making $15 an hour part-time is something else entirely.  Every time I pull out a credit card or dollar bill, I think about how many hours of billable work my purchase is costing me.  $7 at chipotle?  Half an hour of stripping paint.  $6 pint of beer?  See this pile of transmissions?  Move them over there.  $30 dinner?  Fugetaboutit.

When I was a public defender, I was often interviewing folks who were either unemployed or chronically underemployed.  I remember being shocked to learn that many people are getting by on less than $1000 of monthly take-home income.  I sympathized with them very much, but now I can empathize a little bit more.  Of course I’m still privileged and blessed in many, many ways, but at least now I have a slightly better idea of what it feels like to break my back for hours for not that much recompense.  A lot of good people live their lives this way, and I doubt many university grads really know what it feels like.  It’s not better, or worse.  It’s just different.

But of course this endeavor was never about the money; it was about PASSION.  You want to know about the PASSION.  How does it feel to be involved with something you’re so PASSIONATE about?  What’s it like to be involved with a PASSION dream project job?

If I had to describe it right now, I would call it a slow but satisfying burn.  I was very passionate about PD work (and don’t get it twisted; still very passionate about the clients and their struggle), but when I started working as a attorney the job picked up a megaphone, turned it up to 11, and screamed “GO BE FUCKING PASSIONATE” in my ear.  PD work is about fighting, fighting loudly, and fighting brashly.  It’s a job that makes you feel passionate when you’re doing it.  It’s passion by Red Bull.

My work now is more red wine than Red Bull.  Even though motor racing is loud and brash, my current theory is that being passionate about motoring is neither of those things.  The passion manifests itself in patient, quiet, prolonged problem solving.  When I took this job, I had a romantic vision of being a master craftsman: I imagined working alone by candlelight, with pipe smoke (?) curling around me as I slowly whittled a piece of mahogany driftwood into a seatbelt buckle or something like that.  There is some truth to this vision, but a lot of the truth is in the shadows.  I mostly work alone now, and it can feel quite isolating.  At the PD’s office I was ALWAYS surrounded by lots and lots of people–coworkers, court staff, clients.  Now it’s pretty much just me and my boss.  Every day.  To be honest, it can be kind of lonely.  We’ll keep an eye on that.

For years and years I’ve admired the work of good fabricators, skilled welders, and restoration experts.  I’ve pored over tens of thousands of high-res images of cars, motorcycles, and custom parts in my lifetime.  Now I’m getting to be a part of those projects, and so far I’ve realized two things:  First, having a master craftsman teach me techniques is a dream come true.  We live in a world where there is a ton of information online, but not all of it is good.  Having a celebrated veteran of the field teach me what really works is incredible.  Second, behind every single mirror-like paint job, every sexy fast race car, every hand-carved-mahogany-seatbelt-buckle was someone who spent hundreds and hundreds of painstaking, unglamorous hours.  For years I clicked through photos of beautiful vehicles; now the finger I use to click the mouse is starting to wear the callouses of building cars like that, and I’ve barely done shit.

So everyone has been asking me “HOW IS THE PASSION GOING?  IS IT SUPER PASSIONATE??” and I’m not sure how to answer.  Not because I don’t like what I’m doing, but because it feels very different from the passion I was experiencing before.  I once thought that when being a trial attorney was at its best it felt like busting out the most badass, overdriven, fingers-up-on-the-little-tiny-frets improvised guitar riff you could imagine in a crowded, excited venue.  You are completely in control and everyone’s attention is on you.  You are a fucking rockstar.

I’m not sure what restoration work will feel like at its best, but I suspect it’s going to be something much more humble and involve wire brushes.

Things are going to be different.